Thursday 18 October 2012

Why Do Men Cheat?

Am sure loads of women would have been asking this same question or their minds would have been working overtime on why their man cheats on them.
There is no rational explanation to this.
Cheating could be anything secret a man shares with another woman behind his wife or girlfriend, it could be from texting, chatting over the phone, physical/sexually, flirting, to extreme complements etc.
Lack of communication and understanding often leads to a man or a partner cheating.
Some men say they fell out of love which I don’t believe love exist in a relationship.
Main factors that could make a man cheat are home issues, nagging partners, violent partner (some women can be violent), partners not good in bed or able to satisfy her man in bed, partners that can’t dress sexy for their man (women need to dress attractive to impress their man) nothing can beat natural beauty, partners that doesn’t take care of themselves as a woman, mind games also leads to a man's infidelity, always accusing a man of cheating could lead him to cheat.
Greed is another factor.
 All men has tendency to lie. Some men likes varieties, they can’t be pleased or satisfied by one woman. The illusion on a man's head/brain is to get a complete or total woman.
A man can have the best woman, almost complete, she’s beautiful, she never nags, she gives him breathing space, she never stops him from going out but yet he still cheats on her, what makes him cheat? Is it because he likes varieties? Or is it because he's greedy? What could this be?
 A man could just finish sleeping with the sexiest woman in the world, as soon as he steps out of the door and spots another woman he would also find her attractive; give him a chance he would also want to get it on with her.
Most men that cheat with different women would never agree to polygamy or would think polygamy is wrong, but yet they sleep or cheats on their wife/girlfriend with different women.
 High sex drive can never be a good excuse for a man to cheat, it can only be an excuse if the man's wife/girlfriend doesn’t fulfill or satisfy his sexual needs, but still that doesn’t mean he should cheat.
 I think it will be a good idea if people find out more about their potential partner's sex drive before they get into a relationship, this will reduce cheating/infidelity and fallouts in relationships.
Sometimes cheating can be inherited or cultural influenced, inherited means what they have seen their father do, or they might have seen their mum cheat on their father so they think its right to cheat too.
Cultural influence can also be another factor because some cultures believe in polygamy or believe a man has the right to be with more than one woman or concubines.
 Alcohol can also play a major role too.
Some men cannot control themselves when drunk or they get easily sexually arouse or horny when they have had a drink. Some easily get carried away when drunk. Some prefers to cheat when drunk so that they wouldn’t feel any guilty when cheating.
Above all cheating can just be some people's nature. They do it because they enjoy doing it, or maybe they get pleasure out of it.
Some women get with a man that has a history of cheating/infidelity but yet shocked when he cheats on them.
Don’t get me wrong once a cheat never always a cheat, people do change.

Monday 8 October 2012

Does Love Exist??


This is one of the hardest questions in the history or existence of mankind.
There is no rational answer to this.

Morals, lust, romance, chemistry, attachment can often lead to someone say they are in love. Some say love exist maybe I haven’t found it yet, but even if I do what about the long run?

Billions of people round the world ask this same question. Millions will or might not agree to my philosophy.
 Love in a relationship doesn’t exist.
The one and only love that truly exist in this whole wide world is Parental love.
 Nothing in this world can beat parental love.
The love a mother and father have for their offspring is inevitable and unconditional.
Parents love their children till they die no matter if they fallout or anything, that love will always be there.
Only 3percent out of 100 might fall out of love with their children and this might be due to some circumstances or what the child has done to them.

I say love doesn’t exist in a relationship, if you say love exists then I’ve got a
question for you. Can love be bought?...my own answer is yes.
 Money is one of the most powerful things on earth, show some women money and they are all yours, they immediately fall for you and probably tell you they knew they will meet the love of their life and probably tell you how much they love you.
 In the other hand men too tend to fall for a sophisticated woman as well, all they need do is linger around, show affection, tell her what she wants to hear, by doing that his mission is slowly succeeding. This is a true fact, money buy love.

 Is love just a chemical solution in our mind which helps us chooses a sexual partner or is it just a mystical force that guides us to our potential partner?
 Love means different things to different people. Sometimes the word love blows or sweeps potential partners off their feet.
People tend to mistake Attention, Affection, Chemistry and most of all Caring for love.
 In any form of relationship I would say you care not love.
 If love really exists in relationship, then why do people breakup or divorce??
 When people breakup with their partner they say they fell out of love or the relationship is not working. But most will still say they still Care for them, but not in love anymore, and there goes my question again, did the love ever existed in the first place??
 Love should be forever because it comes from the heart, it should never fade, I would say you find real love in older generation, you see couples that have been married for over 60yrs, and probably 20percent have real love.

Some people will say they will do anything for love, in my terms I would say they would do anything because they care. You could do anything for your partner in a relationship, but that doesn’t guarantee a long lasting relationship, don’t get me wrong, when people tell each other in a relationship that they love each other it does open the gate to happiness and also reduces stress, anxiety and worry.
 Sometimes when a partner says I love you, some people tend to reply I love you too just to make the other person feel good. If a man doesn’t say I love you back, he would more likely to lose that woman, or it will always bring friction between the pair because she will start having doubts, negative thoughts also thinking maybe the guy is seeing someone else or having an external affairs.
Some say love is not forever, you make it work, this instead should be relationship is not forever you make it work.
You care a lot and that’s not love.
The reasons why people say they fell out of love is because there's no love in the first place, or they say love died that’s because the expectations wasn’t fulfilled.
There is nothing like love at first sight, it is lust and attraction at first sight. Because you don’t even know about the other person's personality, some people tend to be blinded by lust and attraction.
Because they are already attracted and fallen for the other person they careless about their behaviour and personality and in the long run the attraction slowly fades away and then they end up splitting up or starts living in mystery. 
If love really existed then why after some so-called lovers split up, they start hating each other or can’t stand the sight of each other?

 Above all the only one true long lasting love that never fades is Parental love.
 In relationship it’s Care and not Love.
People tend to say its love but that’s because they care a lot about their partner.

Thursday 27 September 2012

WOMEN WHO ARE MORE LIKELY TO CHEAT

                      
Cheating can be anything you do behind your partner that you keep a secret.
It can also be something you share with an opposite sex or same sex behind your partner that is kept a secret.
women cheat for different reasons, it could be falling out of love, not been treated right by partners, partners not meeting her sexual needs, some women also cheat because they are sexually frustrated as well, or not getting attention or compliments from partner.
 Alcohol plays a big role on infidelity in a woman.
Women who are more likely to cheat are mostly women that always out clubbing, partying and socializing.
Women that likes getting drunk in clubs, parties and socializing venues are more likely to cheat. Some women gets easily loose or lust when drunk.  
Some women also like varieties as well.
 On one of my many experiences and surveys I met a girl at the entrance of a night club, I tried to chat her up ,but then she told me she has a bf, few hours later after she has had a few
drinks I spotted this same girl snogging(kissing) like 3 different blokes and then I thought ‘wow’ strange, After clubbing I and my mates were waiting for taxi home outside the club and a car pulled over and to my greatest surprise it was an old good mate of mine I haven’t seen in 4yrs, then we got chatting and I asked what he's up to and he said he came to pick up his fiancée from the club, to another surprise it was this same girl that he came to pick up, then I thought to myself, this guy hasn’t got any idea what his so-called fiancée has been up to in the club.
Some women lie to their partners that they will be staying at their mate's house after night out, but deep inside they are out on the pull for that night, and up for one night stands, and few don't exchange digits as in phone numbers so that they don’t get caught out.
There was one situation where her partner was in the army and was deployed to another country, she’s always out clubbing and going back with different
men, the weird part is while the next guy is still in bed, she gets up early and runs downstairs to ring her partner pretending to have been at home all night and being a good girl.
Though not all women that drink alcohol or always clubbing or partying cheats.
 Some women don’t drink alcohol nor go clubbing, but they are serial cheaters.
80percent of women that loves alcohol, clubbing and parties do cheat.
 Mind you some women that their partner’s work away cheat as well due to loneliness.
Above all don’t get me wrong, am not saying you shouldn’t go for a woman that loves her parties.

Wednesday 12 September 2012

My Views On Cultural Relationships

Cultural Relationships has been one of the growing factors in the western world.
It has been one of the causes of fallout within families, and stresses in the Big House.

One of my advice is that people should be prepared before getting into one. They should also be prepared to accept the other person's culture, or be able to be adapt.
You cannot just jump into one with closed eyes or let yourself to be blinded by love. I know the saying "love is blind", but there are certain situations or things where love should have eyes.

Factors affecting cultural relationships includes e.g Religion, Tradition, Belief, Culture, Food can also be a factor, Sense of Reasoning, Discipline and Respect Etc.
 
Now, if either party is a Christian or Muslim or you are both following different Religions, you should put each others religion into consideration. Whether you or your partner are willing to accept your respective religions, or in some cases one will want to persuade the other to convert to their religion, this should be first agreed at the early stage.
I have come across many cases where in the long-run the man wants the woman to convert to his Religion but then, the woman is not willing, as it was not discussed initially.
In some cases, the families don't agree with the whole thing, then tension arises, hatred comes into play, resentment, argument,  disagreement and even lead into violence.

Now tradition is also a big factor because people have different traditions, there is a saying that ''you can take all my gold and silver but you cannot take away my Colour and Culture''.

The English have their own tradition same as Africans, Asians amongst all.
Though some traditions are really different and not as easy to follow, or should i say some are stricter than others.
Some take their tradition really seriously even though they have been living in the western world for years.
UK for example is the most Multicultural Country in Europe, you see lots of Caucasian women going for Black African men or Asian men, at first its fun sweet fairytale, but in the long-run that's when the woman realizes that the African and Asian tradition could be quiet restricting and different from they ever imagined.
Apart from the different tradition or culture, Sense of Reasoning too can play a role because the way they reason from where they came from is different, same as discipline and respect.
Africa for example, naughty kids are smacked both in school and at home to teach them respect and as a form of discipline..it goes with the saying "spear the Rod, spoil the child".

This is a true fact, an African child has respect, they are taught to respect everyone that is just a year older than them never-mind someone much older. Some can never tell their parent ''shut up'', "Don't be silly daddy"or ''dad your doing my heading''.

You cant really see a boy of 15 or even less than 23yrs smoking on the road, they get told off or even smacked for that, you don't have to know the child or his family for you tell them off, if found doing wrong.
Women get dirty looks for smoking, now this is an African tradition and the way they reason which some people might or might not agree to.
African or asian men believe to work and provide for the family, while the woman stays at home and takes care of the house and kids, while he loves his food to be ready and served when ready.
Never mind some believes in polygamy (being married to more than one wife);

Circumcision -: This is another factor affecting cultural relationships, it is compulsory in some culture to circumcise their male child while some culture don't regard it atall.
There are families that has had feuds over this issue, i think people should make their researches and be willing to accept their partners culture and tradition before getting into relationships.

Finally, i encourage Intercultural Relationships as far as there's a pre discussion on expectations from both parties. Just the same way couples talk about having kids.
That way you both know what you are getting into, and it becomes easier to manage and control volatile situations.
Cultural Relationship is a beautiful thing, it increases individual knowledge of different cultures and religions, and not  being under any pressure to follow or not to follow.
There will be less family feuds if people make proper research and are willing to adapt to the culture of their potential partner.

Monday 10 September 2012

Faith the Mediocrity of Failure

Faith is a direct opposite of doubt, its extremely contrary to fear,anxiety and worry.
One sure reason why a good number of people are unsuccessful in life today is the fear of failure.
If a child is afraid to fall,he will never learn to walk,and if there is no possibility of failure,then success will be a big ridicule.
Faith overcomes the impossible.
Determination today leads to success tommorrow.
My father used to tell me that dreams come true, but then i thought it was an old man's flow.
Lots of people don't know that dreaming today could become a reality tommorrow.
That is why people need to have faith.
Because with Faith, Failure becomes a mediocre.